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The Story of a Christmas Day Home Fire

 

“A catastrophic house fire is one of those life traumas that you cannot prepare for and that occurs when you least expect it.  Mine came on Christmas night.  In a matter of hours, all of the trappings and creations of a life of 65 years literally “went up in smoke.”  Even today, I still check the house for signs of fire if I smell smoke, although I know the smell is an artifact of the wildfires.  That is just part of my fire PTSD (post-traumatic stress disorder).  The more significant PTSD, however, has come from seeing the printed name of the contractor I hired to rebuild my home.  Sadly, this name has come to represent the most arduous marathon of unimaginable snafus and ineptness.  Enter Our Front Porch (OFP).

Honestly at my wits’ end after 6 months of no progress toward rebuilding my home and going on my 5th different project manager, I happened to read an article about non-profit funding that mentioned OFP in The Denver Post.  I reached out to OFP through their website, and almost immediately was contacted by one of the co-founders.  That day truly changed my life and provided hope where I saw none.  OFP has been the most amazing advocate for me for over a year now.  Trained as an architect, OFP’s Project Manager brings a wealth of knowledge into the rebuilding process, experience and expertise that I lacked but so desperately needed.  Since our first meeting, she has partnered with me every step of the way throughout a reconstruction experience that has truly been “stranger than fiction.” Her unflagging support, her creativity in solving problems, and her incredible resourcefulness have truly been priceless.  

Today, I have my home, and I still have my mind.  I would have lost both of these without the benefit of OFP as a constant source of support and guidance. Slogging through the process of rebuilding a home is difficult under the best of circumstances…the only way around it is through it.  Having OFP as an advocate has been a lifeline for me for which I will be forever grateful.”

This client has showed so much strength and resilience through this process, and we hope this Christmas will bring better memories as she settles into her new home!

Insight from OFP Interns: Madeleine Veith, University of Denver MSW Intern

What have you learned during your time at Our Front Porch?

The most profound sentence I have heard from a handful of clients these last seven months still resonates so deeply: “Thank you for not giving up on me.” I am learning from my clients how difficult it is to navigate after a home fire. They share about unwavering stress, profound grief, and a new need to rely on the people around them… something so difficult and humbling especially for my most independent clients. As people navigate finding new housing, recovering items/documents, and renegotiating boundaries with loved ones, it can seem like nothing is going well for them. I work with these clients in case management and therapy, and I am amazed. They navigate such profound difficulty with tremendous resilience, and they often experience a newfound softening towards leaning on others. That is where that sentence—thank you for not giving up on me—comes in. I am always caught off guard, in part because I can forget how exposed they feel in losing the four walls they could safely live behind. Yet, in calling our clients each week, listening to their stories, and empathizing with them throughout the highs and lows of rebuilding their lives, I see their resilience and courage to keep going. I cannot help but feel honored to enter into their stories and offer support in the small ways I can… but more than anything it has shown me the importance of offering support to my loved ones and receiving support as well. We are all so much stronger when we can lean on each other.

Sympathy is a Garbage Emotion

Guest Blogger: Taylar McCoy, Our Front Porch 2017-2018 Intern

While working at Our Front Porch I have been able to hone some really useful skills, but one thing seems to stick out the most. Our Front Porch has given me an outlet to truly understand the difference between sympathy and empathy. Some people see these words as synonyms, but they are quite different. There are four words that I would consider to be related, but distinguishable: pity, sympathy, empathy, and compassion. Sympathy and empathy tend to be the two ideas that are intertwined the most. I would argue that empathy includes a component of connection and emotional intelligence that only comes from practice.

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10 Things No One Tells You About Being Homeless

Part 2

Guest Blogger: Taylar McCoy, Our Front Porch 2017-2018 Intern

In my most-recent blog post, I wrote about the fact that until I began working with Our Front Porch, I had no idea just how difficult it is to become totally stable after living in that type of unstable environment. The difficulties of trying to save money and start fresh, all while searching for house and looking for a job, are magnified with you’re also trying to support children or a family. And unfortunately, there are other factors that make the recovery process so difficult to navigate.

Photo Credit: Matt Longmire

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When Disaster Strikes… on Vacation

Guest Blogger: Sheila Babyak

Vacations can be the most anticipated, fun-filled events of a lifetime. We spend all year deciding where to go, how to get there, what we’ll do, and budgeting our money to be sure it is a vacation of a lifetime! No one ever thinks that their vacation could be disrupted by some sort of an unexpected event or disaster. While we can’t plan for unknown disruptions or disasters there are things that we can do to prepare ourselves in the event a situation should arise.

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Where the fire started. Photo Credit: Sheila Babyak

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Mindful Eating While Stressed Out: Part 2

Here’s more from our guest blogger, Paige E. Butkus, Nourished to the Core, LLC – Holistic Nutritionist & Yoga Teacher, on how to stay healthy when dealing with stress.

Work on keeping a healthy gut flora.

In order to combat stress we need all of our defenses strong including our gut bacteria. The microscopic bacteria that live inside of our digestional tract help us with more than you may know. Scientists have labeled the stomach our “second brain” for a reason. As much as our mind influences our body, our gut influence our mind. When our healthy bacteria are out of whack:

  • Our immune system is compromised.
  • Our digestion is weakened.
  • Our mental state and mood is negatively affected.
  • Our energy levels are reduced.
  • Our oral health is affected
  • Our craving for unhealthy food increases.
  • Women’s vaginal health is affected.
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Image Credit: Creative Commons

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Yoga: Healing with Intention and Beginning Your Yoga Practice – Part 2

Guest Blogger: Nora Josephson, MA, LPCC, RYT-200

Start with an Intention.

What are you needing right now? What intention can you set for your practice? These can be similar to affirmations or coping thoughts. Maybe you need to hear:

  • “I am okay in this moment”.
  • Possibly it is as simple as, “Breathe in…breathe out.”
  • Or “Inhale” as you inhale and “exhale” as you exhale.
  • Or “I am ______” (examples: I am strong, I am enough, I am loved).
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Photo Credits: Erin Stotts

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The Stressors of Crisis on a Marriage

Guest Blogger: Brittany Siegel, MA MFT  

married couple

Image credit: Creative Commons

Natural disasters have a profound effect on marriage. A marriage can be tightened or eroded by a disaster. When the unexpected happens, couples can undergo severe strain if they are unable to comfort each other. Of course people make adjustments, but for some their life will never be the same. They will never again have what they had.

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Catch Them Being Good: How to Help Kids During Stressful Times

As a follow up to our last blog, Guest Blogger and Behavior Analyst Kristen Stine, M.ED provides some helpful strategies and tactics for parents to use with kids dealing with trauma and stress after a disaster.

kid playing

Image Courtesy of Creative Commons

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Stress After a Disaster: Not Just for “Grown Ups”

Guest Blogger: Lisa A. Mazzeo, LCSW, BCD

When adults feel stressed, they can usually pinpoint the related feeling as well as the cause. They typically take appropriate action and hopefully begin to feel better shortly after implementing a strategy like listening to music, walking the beach or going for a drive. They choose anything that might bring a peaceful feeling back to their overall being.

When children feel stress, the cause, identification and intervention is not always that simple. This is due, mostly, to the fact that children have limited vocabulary to express what is going on, underdeveloped coping mechanisms to deal with it and an inability to make sense of what is happening in their environment.

child angry

Image Courtesy of Flickr

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